Disagreements

[podcast]http://www.revkwon.com/podcast/acts-disagreements.mp3[/podcast]

Last week I left off by saying that redemption requires a friend. We read about how Saul was redeemed as Paul only when a friend, Barnabas, vouched for his friend. Let’s read it in Acts 9:26-28.

²⁶ When he came to Jerusalem, he tried to join the disciples, but they were all afraid of him, not believing that he really was a disciple.²⁷ But Barnabas took him and brought him to the apostles. He told them how Saul on his journey had seen the Lord and that the Lord had spoken to him, and how in Damascus he had preached fearlessly in the name of Jesus. ²⁸ So Saul stayed with them and moved about freely in Jerusalem, speaking boldly in the name of the Lord. Did you see that in verse 27? Barnabas took him and brought him to the apostles. You see, when we get a second chance in life, its not just for us. It’s also for the people we need to bring forth to redeem their own second chances. That’s exactly what Barnabas did for Saul. But today, we’re going to hit a topic that is related to second chances and friendships. Moreover, it’s about what happens sometimes between friends. It’s a subject called “disagreement.” I want to start our message this morning with this truth: Even the closest of friends will disagree. Let me explain that more simply: you’re not always going to agree with people who are most like you! So simple right? Let me give you an example and you’ll probably understand this too. Sometimes my mom didn’t agree with my dad and it became a disagreement. You’re parents probably had a disagreement now and then as well. Sometimes, I disagree with Michelle. Sometimes she disagrees with me. The only time where there’s no chance of her disagreeing with me is during a Notre Dame football game. Just think about it, you and your closest friends, your bestest friends disagree. I remember when I was a little older than you guys and was in junior high school. My closest friends had a disagreement so huge that they cried when they disagreed. The funniest part was back when I was growing up there was only one coffee shop in flushing. Can you believe that? There wasn’t a single starbucks. They disagreed at a very public place. Then the owner, we knew the owner we were there so often, that he asked me if the guys were breaking up because they were crying. And then on the street, when we left, they all disagreed with me because I didn’t disagree with them enough to cry like they cried. At which point, I said, “I don’t cry, I’m not a girl.” They disagreed with me so much that I said that, they didn’t talk to me again for at least four years. True story. In this story we’re going to read in Acts, we’re going to find Paul and Barnabas about 15 years removed from the last story we read where Barnabas brought Saul to the disciples. So remember how long these guys have been friends. They were friends for at least fifteen years. They were such good friends that when one of them went on mission, the other one would come and ask the other to join him. They preached together, they ate together, they went camping together, they worked together. They were practically brothers.

Now we get to Acts 15, let’s pick up the story in verse 36. ³⁶ Some time later Paul said to Barnabas, “Let us go back and visit the believers in all the towns where we preached the word of the Lord and see how they are doing.” ³⁷ Barnabas wanted to take John, also called Mark, with them, ³⁸ but Paul did not think it wise to take him, because he had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not continued with them in the work. ³⁹ They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company. Barnabas took Mark and sailed for Cyprus, ⁴⁰ but Paul chose Silas and left, commended by the believers to the grace of the Lord.⁴¹ He went through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches. (Acts 15:36-41)

The Bible says in verse 39 that they had “such a sharp disagreement that they parted company.” I just told you that these guys spent pretty much the last 15 years together. And over a disagreement, they said its time to split up. I want you to know two things about disagreements. The first is that “disagreements are creatures of passion.” When I say that, I’m saying that when disagreements happen, iit’s because there is some type of strong and barely controllable emotion about a subject. If people could control themselves there would be no disagreements. I’m not talking about debating or differing opinions. I’m talking about disagreements that lead to broken bottles and people hitting each other and yelling and cursing and getting thrown into cars. Like the hulk type of disagreements. You will realize that disagreements happen when one or more people cannot control themselves anymore about a particular subject or object. The second thing you need to know is that there are always faults on both sides. In a disagreement there is not one single person who is wrong– it is all people who are involved. After all, you can’t disagree with yourself, there needs to be at least two. 15 years of friendship, and do you know what Paul and Barnabas fought about? It was a guy named John Mark. Let’s look into who this John Mark was. John Mark is the guy who wrote the Gospel of Mark. That’s right. But let’s look at what exactly Luke was writing about Mark when he wrote this passage we just read about the fight that Paul and Barnabas had.

• ⁵¹ A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, ⁵² he fled naked, leaving his garment behind. (Mark 14:51-52)
• ¹¹ Then Peter came to himself and said, “Now I know without a doubt that the Lord has sent his angel and rescued me from Herod’s clutches and from everything the Jewish people were hoping would happen.” ¹² When this had dawned on him, he went to the house of Mary the mother of John, also called Mark, where many people had gathered and were praying. (Acts 12:11-12)
• ⁴ The two of them, sent on their way by the Holy Spirit, went down to Seleucia and sailed from there to Cyprus. ⁵ When they arrived at Salamis, they proclaimed the word of God in the Jewish synagogues. John was with them as their helper. (Acts 13:4-5)
• ¹⁰ My fellow prisoner Aristarchus sends you his greetings, as does Mark, the cousin of Barnabas. (You have received instructions about him; if he comes to you, welcome him. (Colossians 4:10)
• ¹¹ Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry. (2 Timothy 4:11)

This guy John Mark was a good guy, except that he got home sick a lot and went home when things got a little tough. But that’s not the important part. The important part is that at some point in Paul and Mark’s life, they reconciled. Paul genuinely liked Mark even though he disagreed with Barnabas about him in the first place. So here’s my last point, and I’m going to wrap up. Only charity can overcome disagreements. The word charity is actually from the root word, charis, which is how God shows His love to people. What’s not written in Acts because it doesn’t go that far, is that God fills Paul up with charity, that is a love for His people. What an amazing thing that is. I mean, when we think about it, charity was the only way we were able to stop being in disagreement with God. We were sinners, condemned by our own natures to spend an eternity away from the presence of God. It was in God’s love, through His charity, that He sent His only begotten Son to die a horrific death on a cross to pay the penalty he should never have had to pay so that we would stop being in disagreement with the very nature of God.

This is why we come to church. This is why we call it the good news. Because when we were in disagreement with God, the good news was that Jesus came to end the disagreement. This is what Acts is all about. This is why God gives us power. This is what we are witnesses of. This is why we have second chances. This is why we need to be brave. We lived in disagreement and now thait’s changed. When we find ourselves in disagreement, we must always seek charity. We must always try to act out love in the midst of disagreement just like Jesus did when we were in disagreement with God. We are called by God, we are created by God to be living in agreement, we should not waste our time in disagreement. If you fight, find charity. If you argue, find charity. If you are passionately against or for something, you need to find charity. Show your love and dissolve your disagreement. I want to also point one last thing out. Disagreement is the opposite of “Amen.” Amen means I agree. So when we disagree, then we are not in Amen. When we build a church or plant our lives based on charity, there will be no disagreement that cannot be overcome.

I want to go to our memory verse for today. It comes from Amos 3. It goes like this: Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so? (v3). You cannot walk with God if you don’t agree to do so. Make your choice, He has already shown you charity.

Choose to walk with God in Amen. Let’s pray.